Hell In The Headquarters
by Orihara Izaya
Summary: Life in the headquarters can be fun or simply boring depending on each person; but it can definitely be a hell when you have a stalker. OC/Comedy
1. Hell 1

** Man Belongs to Hoshino Katsura**

**Author's notes:**

**1** I _**do not**_ own any of the characters except of the girl you're going to meet through this first part.  
**2** This story is a _**comedy **_so read at your own risk. Also do not expect much of romance.  
**3** You'll realise that I need a **_betaR_**. If any of you is interested, please contact. I don't think that this story will be really long anyway. If you enjoy her, please help.  
**4 **I'll be really glad to read reviews with your opinion about the beggining of the story; I started watching DGM just recently and it's my first time writing a DGM fanfic.

* * *

It was a rather peaceful day. Akumas' action had been reduced those days, so the members of the Black order had finally found a chance to rest, even though everyone knew that Akuma would come back in full force after they recover forces and re-group again. However, everyone was used to this and everything was under control as groups of Exorcists were going out on patrols when something suspicious was coming into the picture.

"ALlEEEEEN!" Komui's voice interrupted Allen's rest.

The silver-haired boy opened his eyes surprised. Luckily the supervisor wouldn't find him. He had finally found time to rest and he didn't want anyone to ruin that. An evil smirk appeared on his face as he felt proud of his self for being one step ahead; he had locked his door. After experiencing the same situation over and over again he had decided to take his measures.

"AAAALLEN!" a rather pissed voice called from outside and a horrifying sound followed.

Allen saw his door being cut in two in terror. Komui was standing in the doorway holding a saw. Horrible memories jumped into his mind and the poor youngster screamed in dismay. Ever since he entered the Black Order he didn't have a very good relationship with the saws.

"Allen! Were you trying to keep your lovely Supervisor out of your room?" Komui asked looking like a demon.

"No… not really," Allen answered fast, gulping as Komui had gone berserk once again.

"Oh, that's great then!" Komui said calming down.

"Hu-uh," Allen breathed keeping a defensive stance.

"Allen! I need your help!" Komui said bringing his face closer to Allen's. "It's an emergency," he said placing his hand on Allen's shoulder. "And you're the only one I can trust."

Allen felt cold sweat running down his spine. Considering Komui's actions in the past it would be something weird and crazy, all the others had already turned him down and he chose him to help as he didn't have any other options. Allen could see the disaster coming; yet he could see no way out of it as it wasn't that simple to run away from Komui.

"Wha-what is it... Supervisor?" he asked expecting the worst.

"It's a new member!"

"Euh?"

"A new member joined Black Order!" Komui declared. "A New member joined us."

"But isn't that great news... Supervisor?" Allen asked confused.

"Not at all!"

"Wh-why?"

"It's a guy! I saw the name on the papers!"

"And…and what's wrong with that?"

"I have to keep this guy away from Lenalee!" Komui said. "I will do it! I'll protect my little sister making all the big brothers in the world, who see their beloved sister being taken away from outsiders, proud!"

Allen looked at Komui, who had started his weird manifesto, nervously. As Lenalee was in the Headquarters the most of the time, because no missions had been assigned to them lately, Komui had no reason to complain, yet he had gone crazy the latest days getting suspicious of almost every man in the order when they happened to be around his beloved sister.

"Oh...Is…is that so? Then why do you need me, Supervisor?" Allen nervously asked.

"We're going to give a... welcoming party to this new member," He said with an evil look on his face.

"I have a bad feeling about this," Allen said.

Few minutes later Allen was accompanying Komui; waiting for the new member to arrive they had sneaked into the science department where-as Komui said-the new member was supposed to make his appearance. He had no idea what Komui had in his mind, but he knew that it wouldn't be good. Finally a shadow appeared and a figure, dressed in a white coat, came into the scene.

"HA!" Komui exclaimed and jumped on the newcomer. "I'm supervisor Komui!" He said with a demonic sound in his voice. "Hehehe...Let me expl-"

"AHHH!" a girly yell filled the room. "Help me! A weird man is harassing me! HEEEEEELP!"

"Komui-san! That's not a guy!" Allen said panicked; the whole situation had ended into a huge misunderstanding.

"No! That's not it!" Komui said panicked realizing his position. "Please, stop yelling," he said pushing the girl back.

"AH! Don't touch me you pervert!" The girl screamed as Komui's hands had landed on a forbidden place because the girl was trying to push him away. "HELP!" she screamed again and punched Komui right in his face.

Komui fell back badly beaten while the girl covered herself and moved back. Allen looked at the whole scene puzzled; it seemed she didn't need help at all after all. Then again, Allen had to make a few things clear. Thanks to Komui the first impression that girl would have for the Order wouldn't be good at all. Allen approached her smiling nervously; ignoring Komui who had passed out.

"Eeemm..." he said scratching the back of his head.

"Don't get closer!" she said. "I can't allow any of you to touch me!" she claimed.

"Euh?"

"My whole self is devoted to someone else after all," she said lacing her hands and a 'divine' light illuminated her. "That's why I came here."

Allen's smile became even more nervous; yet another weirdo had appeared, Black Order seemed to be like a magnet to them. Trying to avoid any confusing, pointless conversations, he decided to change the subject.

"My name is Allen Walker. I'm an exorcist. Welcome to the Order!" he said reaching out his hand.

"AH! Nice to meet you!" she said shaking Allen's hand with both hands. "I'm here to join the science department! I'm finally able to enter this place!"

"Ahh..." Allen said smiling nervously. "And you might be..."

"Alex Stalker! Isn't that nice? Our names sound similar!"

"You're a girl, right?" Allen asked.

"Right!"

"I guess the Supervisor has to pay more attention to the details when he checks an application," Allen mumbled.

"WELCOME TO THE ORDER!" Komui said out loud; recovering fast as usual.

"AH!"

"Don't worry, it was just a misunderstanding!" Allen said holding her back.

"That's right! I, Komui Lee, am the Supervisor here! And as you're not a guy you're very welcomed! Not to mention that the science department needs some women," Komui said giving a thump up. "When we have enough female members I will personally force the women there wear mini-skirts! Like this, even though Lenalee will be the cutest of all, they will take their attention away from her!" Komui said burning with determination.

"Euh?" the girl vocalized blinking.

"Eeehhh...Don't mind that," Allen said.

"Eh? Allen? Big brother? What happened here?"

"LENALEE!" Komui said ready to attack his sister but Lenalee stopped him without a sweat.

"Ah, Lenalee, we have a new member today. She will join the science department,' Allen said.

"Nice to meet you, my name is-"

"Lenaleeeeee..." Kumui cried attached to Lenalee's side, hooked on her shirt.

"Em...I guess you've figured out," Lenalee said.

"I'm Alex Stalker," she said bowing making her dirty blond hair touch the floor. "Nice to meet you."

"I guess my brother caused you some trouble," Lenalee said with a nervous smile. "Let us treat you as an apology. Come I'll show you the way to the cafeteria and you can tell us more about you."

Like this, few minutes later, Allen, Komui and Lenalee were sitting along with the newcomer. Allen had already cleaned five plates of food which were more like an appetizer to him while Komui was drinking the coffee Lenalee made for him from his infamous cup.

"So, were you aiming to enter the order for a long time?" Lenalee asked taking a sip of her tea.

"No. I decided to join just a while ago. I was searching for this place for a long time. Fortunately I was able to find a man who helped me come here!" she said excited.

"Oh, is that so? So you have no particular reason to join the order," Allen concluded looking at her blinking.

"Of course I have!" the girl said.

Really? What is it if you don't mind me asking?" Lenalee asked.

"I came here to find my love!" she said lacing her hands while hearts with wings were flying around her. "I missed him so much! I bet he feels the same! I lost his tracks about three months ago but I knew he was here so I came to find him!"

"Ah? Your love?" the others repeated quizzically.

"Yes!"

"Then we might know him!" Allen said.

"Huh! How is he? Can you give us some hints?" Komui asked.

"You guys! Don't be indiscreet!" Lenalee said.

"No! It's fine!" Alex said. "My love is really sweet and caring! And he likes to help the others," she said smiling with a bright shade of crimson on her cheeks.

"Oh, is he old or young?" Komui asked.

"Ah? Young!" she said.

"It must be Reever-san!" Allen concluded.

"Ah! How romantic! Is that why you joined the science department Alex-san? So you will be able to be with him?" Lenalee asked.

"Hehehe… one guy less," Komui snickered.

"Big brother!"

"No! He is not in that department! I just couldn't enter here with any other way," she said. "My uncle is a scientist and I used to be his apprentice, so I entered here as an assistant."

"Euh? So if he is not in the science department then...' Allen started.

"He is..." Komui continued.

"An exorcist!" the girl said pointing out a finger smiling.

"Ah? An exorcist?" the other said.

"Yes!"

"So there is a high possibility for us to know him and my big brother knows everyone here so..." Lenalee started. "Em… Can you give us more hints?" she asked.

"How he looks like an all?" Allen asked.

"Ah, right! He is really cute and wise! He is also very strong and shy!" she said.

"And who gave you the directions to come here?" Allen asked.

'Ahhhhh... It was an old man..."

"Lenalee..." Allen whispered to her ear. "There is no mistaken. It's Lavi. He probably started to flirt with her and he made her create empty hopes. Poor girl..."

"Huh-uh," Lenalle nodded. "It must be like this."

"Lenalee what is it? Tell your big brother too!" Komui said looking at her impatiently.

"YO! Allen, Lenalee, Komui-san!"

"LAVI!" Lenalee and Allen called in unison.

"Perfect timing!" Allen said.

"Euh? What is it?" Lavi asked blinking.

"Lavi! Stalker-san is here to see you! She was searching for you for a long time!" Allen said.

"Lavi! Make up to her! You just can't leave a girl behind like this!" Lenalee said ready to defend the rights of every single heart-broken girl in the world.

"AH! It's my first time seeing her but I don't mind!" Lavi said giving a thump. "Thanks Lenalee!"

"Euh?" Lenalee exclaimed blinking. "So you don't know each other?"

"Not at all," both Lavi and Alex said.

"I don't really get the whole situation here," Lavi said.

"No. My love is really cute, no comparing," the girl said shaking her head.

"Eeeeuuuuhhhh?" Lavi exclaimed. "That hurt."

"Emmm... then who could it be?" Allen wondered.

"What about Krory?" Lavi asked. "Do you think Kuro-chan can be the one she is searching for?"

"Ah? Is your 'love' kind of dark?" Allen asked.

"Hmmm... not that much..." she said.

"Krory-san!' Allen waved. 'Can you please come!"

"Ah, I found him!" the girl said looking to a completely opposite direction. "AH! Isn't he cute while he is eating! Kyyyya!"

_"This thing needs more salt!"_ the man she was looking at said and everyone exclaimed rolling their eyes.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHH? KANDA?"

"Yuu? Cute?" Lavi asked shocked. "And more than me?"

"So! Yuu is his name, right?"

"You don't even know his name Stalker-san?" Allen asked but she had already left.

"_YUU!"_ she called running towards him.

"_I said don't ca-AH! It's you!"_ Kanda said with an expression of horror on his face, something you can't see that easy. "_I thought you-"_

"_AH! I finally found you!"_ she said falling into his embrace. "We can be together now!"

"Ah... he fainted..." Lavi said blinking

"_See? I told you he is shy!"_ the girl said turning to them.

"Somehow I think that she can't get the right picture," Allen said while the rest were looking with their mouths hanged.

"Hello everyone!" Reever greeted.

"You're really out of point here,' everyone said looking at him with gloomy faces.

"Euh? Did I do something wrong?" Reever wondered.

And that's how all begun... Kanda's life in the headquarters wouldn't be the same from that day...

* * *

**I hope I'll be able to upate soon.**

**Next time: Kanda doesn't seem to be _so_ happy! Stalker-san doesn't seem to realise. New member! New troubles! Let our souls be saved from this love and this fanfic**

_**Notes: **None of the characters have been hurt through the making of this fanfiction even though Kanda didn't feel so good at the end. We're apologising to the fans he shall return full-strength is the next one._


	2. Hell 2

**We Apologize to Hoshino Katsura for the Suffer Of Her Character**

**First:** **_Thanks For Your reviews . I'm glad you found the first part funny enough._**  
**Second:** _**Thanks for finding the first part funny enough**_  
**Third:** _**I hope you'll find this part funny enough as well**_  
**Fourth:_ I hope I'll get reviews with your opinion yet again_**  
**Fith:** _**Thanks for keeping up reading this worthless prologue**_  
**Sixth:** _**I hope you will enjoy the part. Thanks for your support!**_

_**Note:** I hope that the grammar and spelling won't be that horrible. In case you're intrested to beta please conntact me, I'll be really greatful_

* * *

Everyone was looking at Kanda with a nervous smile playing on their lips. No one was expecting this kind of reaction from him; he fainted. Unlike them that weird girl was holding Kanda in her arms with a bright smile, full of happiness, on her face giving a rather odd picture; she was more like a sadistic serial killer who was holding her prey into her arms than a girl who had finally reunited with her love.

"Stalker-san..." Allen said nervously.

"Isn't that nice? We're finally together," she said hugging Kanda.

"Everyone, keep telling yourself, that Yuu fainted because he was extremely happy to see her and couldn't take this feeling and this odd image will vanish..." Lavi said while the corner of his lips were moving spasmodically as he was trying to force a smile.

Of course that wasn't close to the truth at all, obviously. Kanda-not only he wasn't happy to see her-but he was also wishing that he wouldn't see her ever again. The shock he took when he saw her into the headquarters was too big to take, even for him. That's why when he finally regained consciousness he was wishing that all was a bad dreams, aka an awful nightmare. He could tell that a lot of people were gathered around him so, clearly, he wasn't in his bed, thus he slowly opened his eyes wishing that the worst wasn't true.

"Ah! You're finally awake," a cheerful voice said and he saw that weird girl smiling at him.

"What are you doing here?" he snapped jumping on his feet.

"We have to admit that he recovers fast," Lavi said.

"I came to see you!" the girl said lacing her hands. "We can be together now!"

"Like this will ever happen! Go back to your uncle!" Kanda snapped.

"Kanda! How can you be that mean to Stalker-san!" Allen asked. "She came all the way to see you!"

"Isn't that obvious? It's because she is a stalker!" Kanda snapped.

"You can treat someone like this because of his family name! That's unfair!" Allen said.

"...I wasn't meaning it that way," Kanda said making a grimace.

"How cruel!" Lenalee said placing an arm around Allen who was standing on her knees. "Boys are so ungrateful, they never understand the heart of a young woman, don't mind Alex-san."

"I don't mind!" Alex said. "I know that it's just a cover. He may appears to be an arrogant, anti-social jerk..."

"EUH?" Kanda exclaimed while Lavi and Allen were trying to hold their laughs back.

"But he is sensitive inside," she said with an extremely faithful tone in her voice.

"Oooohhh..."

Kanda,-sensitive; it sounds more like a lame joke. All of them, except of Krory who was looking at them trying to figure out what was happening, looked at Kanda who was standing with his arms folded while a vein was trembling threateningly on his forehead. Lavi and Allen raised an eyebrow and turned to each other having two big mischievous smiles plastered on their faces; for them that was going to be fun.

"Ahh...I totally agree Stalker-san! Kanda is obviously too happy to see you!" Allen said.

"Euh?" Kanda turned tensed.

"That's right-that's right! Yuu softened by the time you entered here. Normally he would have yell at everyone by now, but see..." Lavi said patting Kanda's shoulder. "...he is just standing here."

"Do you want a piece of me?" Kanda asked ready to draw his sword. "And don't call me Yuu again!"

"Ah! I'm so happy Yuu!" she said with tears of joy in her eyes. "I was afraid that you'd be mad because I came here! But now I know that you fell this way I'll not leave this place no matter what!" she said and hugged him preventing his attack-without knowing it-as she took him by surprise.

"Just go back to your uncle already!" Kanda said trying to push her away.

"Guys will never understand pure love after all," Lenalee said folding her arms and shook her head in disappointment.  
"Don't blame everything on us!" Lavi said. "It's not our fault that the girls always mean something else, or better the opposite, of what they say!"  
"He has a point," Allen said supporting Lavi.

_"Let me go!" _Kanda said in the background

"You should start using your brains more," Lenalee insisted. "After all, if you know that a girls means the opposite of what she says then why don't you do the opposite?"

"And why aren't they say exactly what they think! That would make it easier to everyone!" Lavi answered back.

"You're not the one to talk when you hit on-almost-every girl you see," she said aiming a finger at him.

"That's right Lenalee! Dump all the other guys and stay with your big brother!" Komui said raising his fist. "Only your big brother can understand you completely!"

"Hello! This is supposed-to-be-_MY_-show," Kanda said trying to push away Alex who was attached to him waiting to hug her back. "You're getting out of topic!"

"Sorry," everyone said bowing.

"Alex-san, follow me please. I'll show you your room," Lenalee said with a smile.

"But..."

"Come," she said taking her hand. "You need rest as well, ne? Then you'll be able to come back with full energy and keep Kanda company," she said winking

"Don't give her ideas," Kanda said glaring at Lenalee

"Ah, you're right," she said taking her luggage. "Thanks for the meal!" she said bowing.

"Big brother, come and carry them!" Lenalee demanded. "You guys are no good, were you expecting a girl who just came here to carry them? Especially you Kanda!"

"Keep me out of this! And don't take her side!" Kanda snapped.

"Huh, let's go," Komui said taking the luggage.

Komui leaded the way, obeying his sister, while Lenalee and Alex were following smiling at each other. Kanda's right eyebrow twitched as he was watching the scene; his suffering was officially signed the time that girl took the way to her room. Nevertheless, his attention was drown away when he heard chuckles behind him; Allen and Lavi were enjoying their selves to the fullest seeing Kanda being troubled like that.

"Is it _that_ funny?" Kanda growled and turned to them with an anime vein.

"Not really," Allen and Lavi said in unison hugging each other. "AAH!" they yelled and stepped back when they realized what they had done.

"Che..." Kanda placed a hand on his forehead troubled.

"Kaaa-NDA!" Komui called with a sing-sang voice.

"What is it now?" Kanda asked; obviously in not-a-very-good mood.

"I have a new mission for you tomorrow!" he said.

"Why tomorrow and not today? I can leave right now," Kanda said decisively. "Just give me the info and-"

"Ahhh...Did you see that? Kanda wants to run away from a girl..." Lavi mumbled  
"Huh, he is not that brave after all," Allen added; both having devilish smiles on their faces.

Kanda tensed; the last he wanted was to lose the image of the badass, aka the image of the superior he had built. Luckily Allen and Lavi sensed the dark aura coming from him soon enough and smiled nervously making their way out of the cafeteria trying to ensure their safety.

_"We'll see you later Yuu! You'll have to find time for your love anyway."  
"Ah, what a lucky guy; having someone to love you so much must feel nice, right?"_ Lavi and Allen said standing on the doorway.

"What?" Kanda asked ready to draw his sword but both of them had already ran away.

Kanda frowned and took the way back to his room trying to think of the way to get out of that situation. Naturally he would call he uncle right away but that man used to move a lot so it would be impossible to contact him that easy. Having an odd girl following him around didn't sound that appealing to him though.

"I guess I'll have to deal with this provisionally," he said and frowned sitting on his bed. "At least I'll leave for a mission tomorrow...so I won't have that crazy girl around me."

Yet, not having someone around you doesn't mean that you won't see him as well. The next day didn't start well for Kanda yet again. Komui had assigned him a mission along with two other exorcists; something which didn't find him conformed. He preferred to deal with his business alone.

"I don't need anyone to burden me, I can deal with it...Supervisor..." Kanda said folding his hands.

"Come on Kanda-san! You can't do everything alone! Make some frie-" Komui started to say but he cut his words when he saw Kanda's glare. "Well, you have to deal with it anyway, Kanda-san," Komui continued.

"Komui-san! Don't talk about us like we're some kind of burden!"

"Ah! That's right! We're capable exorcists as well!" the other two exorcists complained.

"Anyway, we'll have to leave for Denmark as soon as possible, the sooner we reach there the sooner we'll finish," Kanda said.

"YUUUUUuuu"

Kanda tensed and the right corner of his lips played spasmodically; he knew very well to whom that voice belonged to. He was hoping to leave for his mission without any unwanted encounters; yet his fortune didn't seem to work the latest days. He turned with his eyes rolled when he heard the steps becoming faster and faster.

"Yuu! You should tell me that you were going out for a mission!" she said falling into his embrace. "I just found out just a while ago. I didn't want to let you leave without saying goodbye," she said looking up with puppy eyes.

"That was what I wanted to do though," Kanda mumbled looking away.

"Ah! I made something for you!" she said showing him a bag.

"Euh?"

"Ah? What is it?" Komui asked along with the two other exorcists, who don't need names as they are only random guys which they'll not likely appear after this chapter, asked.

"It's the bento of love!" she said taking out a bento. "See Yuu, I made it for you!" she said opening the box.

Kanda sweat dropped when he noticed the heart-shaped onigiri in it and his eyes rolled. He tried to make her close the bento before anyone else take notice but it was already too late, the two other exorcists were already chuckling behind his back giving him weird looks. Kanda flushed in embarrassment and sent a glare to them.

"What's that funny?" he barked.

"Ahh... nothing," they said trying to hold their laughs back.

"Anyway, I don't need your bento," he said.

"But you have a long way to do, you'll get hungry," she said tending the bento to him.

"I said I don't need it."

"Ahh...Since Kanda doesn't want it," Komui said extending his hand towards the bento not noticing Alex's glare at his move. "I guess "I will-AAAAH!"

Komui screamed in pain and drew his hand back as Alex closed the box hurting his fingers the time his hand reached it. Komui turned to her quizzically only to receive her glares, something which made him to turn white.

"This is the Bento-Of-Love! I made it for Yuu! I don't want weird guys like you to touch it," she said surrounded by dark aura.

"Ah, Stalker-san, if it's about the first day… it was just a misunderstanding, don't think about it, ne? And we wouldn't like the others know as well, ne?" Komui asked with a nervous smile.

"AHHHH!"

"What did I do now?" Komui asked placing his hands on his head.

"He vanished! Yuu left!" she said.

"Oh...that's too bad...Can I take the bento now?" Komui asked.

"I said NO!"

At the same time Kanda was already leaving the Headquarters along with the other two exorcists. In the end he was able to escape from that, however that annoying cheerful mumbling hadn't stop behind him.

"Kanda, we didn't know that you have such a cute girlfriend," one of them said.  
"Huh! You seem to have a nice relationship," the other chuckled.

"If you mention this again," Kanda said while a vein popped on his forehead. "I'll mistake you for Akuma."

"Euh, we won't mention it again," the first said smiling nervously.  
"Huh, we forgot all about it already," the other said waving his hands.

"Che... How on earth did she find me? I made sure that she won't follow me here," Kanda mumbled.

Kanda took his answer few days later when he finally returned back succeeding in his mission for one more time. Then again that time he wasn't that excited about going back home to rest as he was aware of the hell he was going to get through. If he was lucky enough he would return to his room without anyone noticing, so he made sure to pass between everyone making his self as unnoticed as he could.

"Ah Yuu, you're back. How did it go?" Lavi's familiar voice rang into his ear.

A vein throbbed on Kanda's forehead and he turned to the person who had ruined his plan of passing unnoticed.

"I told you not to call me that!" he said angrily.

"You don't have to be so loud," Lavi said. "You draw all the attention." he added making him realize what he had done as everyone had turned his attention to him.

A pause followed with Kanda looking around cautiously and luckily nothing happened. Kanda sighed while Lavi was looking at him blinking.

"What is it Yuu?"  
"I said...Don't call me by my first name!" Kanda snapped.

"YUUUuuuu!" he heard his name called and the next moment someone had jumped into his embrance again. "You're finally back, now we can spend some time together," she said with a blush of happiness coloring her cheeks. "I'm so happy I'm here, I was searching for you all this time after all. It's all thanks to Tiedol-san, I'm really grateful to him," she said burring her face into his chest.

"What? That old man!" Kanda growled trying to hold back his anger.

* * *

**Next Time:** **_Kanda makes a call to the man behind this. His hell is still on. Love is in the air-even though Kanda hates it. Next Time, Stalker-san's affection! Let our souls be saved from this pitiful original character._**

**_Note: Kanda is taking anger-management classed after the end of each part and attends a psychologist twice a week. Don't worry, we make everything possible to keep this character's sanity into normal (for __Κ__anda) limits. _**


	3. Hell 3

**First! A big thanks to Kin-san(KinKitsune01) for the Beta! Thanks for dealing with me!**

**_Also a big thanks to all of you who keep up with this story! Thanks for dealing with me as well. Also I bet that all of you are a bit relieved that Hoshino will get back to work._**

**_Yosh! I hope you'll like the chapter! Thanks again everyone!_**

* * *

"That old man," Kanda growled, waiting on the phone. "Why did he..."

Allen and Lavi were watching him from the corner, having almost half of the entire Order beside them. Dark vibes were rippling off of him into the air, sending chills down to everyone's spine. Kanda sent them a glare. The last he wanted was everyone crowding around him, and Tiedoll seemed like he was avoiding his calls. This was the 15th attempt he made to contact him.

"Hello~!"

A cheerful, yet calm voice, finally answered. Kanda tightened his fist around the phone and hit the wall with the other one trying to channel his anger on something, letting a grunt the same time.

"Hello~ Hello~ . This grunt sounds familiar..."

A vein popped on Kanda's forehead as he was trying to control his temper. That time his mentor had passed the line. On the top of that he should know very well who was the one trying to contact him after the 15 attempts Kanda had made to come in contact with him.

"Tiedoll-san," Kanda said, but it came out more like a growl.

"Oh, Kanda, my son, it's you. I knew that there was something in this grunt. Haha."

"Don't 'haha' me! Master! What were you thinking?"

"Ah, it's true; I shouldn't have made that choice. I really shouldn't order shabu-shabu when I enjoy tempura far more. Now I want to eat Tempura as well-"

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?"

"Oh, do you mean about the birthday gift I sent you?"

"The what?"

"Oh, just forget it. Ahhh~ I really have to order Tempura now."

"MASTER?"

"Yes?"

"I was talking about that annoying girl! Why did you give her directions to come here? What were you thinking?"

"The annoy-Oh! You mean Alex-san! Cute, isn't she?"

"She is not! Just come here and take her back! The last thing I want is someone following me around!"

"Ah, it doesn't sound that bad."

"It is! That girl is crazy! And... She even, she even calls me... cute," he said, saying the last word with a tone of disgust in his voice.

"No wonder. All my pupils are really cute."

"Why did you send her here at the first place?" Kanda asked frowning.

"Oh! You were looking so good together back then so I thought; there won't be many women in Kanda's life who will be able to stand him, so why not?" said Tiedoll in a cheerful tone.

"WHAT?"

Mixed chuckles made Kanda tense as half of the Order was trying to hold back their laugh, with Allen and Lavi being on the frontline. Kanda turned to them with a bright shade of red sweeping across his cheeks, but the more he looked at them, the harder it was for them to hold their laughs back.

"You're 18-years-old after all. Don't be shy; every young man of your age needs a gi-"

"Stop saying nonsense! This is the last thing I need right now!" Kanda snapped. "Just send someone to ta-"

"Ah! My Tempura is here! It was nice to talk to you, son! Call more often!"

"Wait! WAIT! Tiedoll-sama! You can't hang up li-" Kanda stop when a monotone sound of beep replaced Tiedoll's voice. "That...old man...WHAT'S SO FUNNY?" he grunted, turning to the others.

"No-nothing!" They said and vanished, leaving only Allen and Lavi in their wake.

Kanda placed a hand on his forehead; obviously, Tiedoll wouldn't be much of help. It seemed that he'd have to find some kind of solution to all of this on his own.

"Yuu!"

Kanda twitched.

"What is it now?" he snapped.

"I made you soba! They told me that it's your favorite! Look!"

Kanda looked at the dish making a face. Why did that girl have to make _everything_ heart-shaped? He looked from the dish to her, who was looking at him with sparkling eyes and then back to the dish.

"Che.." Kanda said turning his face away.

"Ehhh...Did I do something wrong? You don't like soba after all? Does it look weird?" she asked looking at the dish.

"No, I-"

"Ah! I was worried for a moment!" she said relieved placing the disk in Kanda's hands. "Oh! This will be the first time you've taken something that I cooked especially for you!" she said turning red.

"No I didn't-"

"I hope you'll enjoy the meal!" she said bowing and then vanished leaving a trail of dust behind her.

"What th-"

"Kanda~" two creepy voices called behind him.

"Ah? What is it?"

Allen and Lavi were attached to each of his sides having a rather creepy look on their faces. Kanda looked at each other them pouting.

"Kanda, you crossed the line," Allen said.

"You're already on the other side now, buddy," Lavi continued.

"What do you mean?" Kanda calmly asked.

"It's the curse!" Allen said.

"The curse?" Kanda repeated.

"Whenever a guy accepts something from a girl, there is no going back! A greater bond is instantaneously created!" Lavi said making his voice sound even creepier.

"Only few have managed to escaaaaape!" Allen said making Kanda gulp.

"N-Nonsense," he said turning purple. "There is no such a thing!" he said taking his place on the table.

Kanda looked at the dish stubbornly and took a bite. Allen and Lavi let a gasp.

"How brave! As expected from Yu!" Lavi said clapping.

"Stop calling me that!" Kanda snapped.

"I feel a little hungry too," Allen said, staring at Kanda's dish.

"Yosh! Let eat as well!"

After a few minutes Kanda and Lavi were watching a pile of plates that was getting taller and taller as Allen had made a new personal record, finishing up 33 full plates in one sitting. Kanda shrugged; he wasn't enjoying his company at all, everything seemed to take a turn for the worst and he was blaming his self for letting himself act like that during that mission few months ago.

"Hi Allen, everyone," Lenalee greeted them.

"Yo Lenalee!" Lavi greeted first.

"Welmuch Lenmuchsan."

"Allen! Don't talk with your mouth full!" Lenalee said pinching Allen's cheek.

"Lenalee! What are you? My mother?" Allen complained trying to brush her hand away.

"Just watch your manners young man!" Lenalee noted.

"Oi-oi, you two!" Lavi said. "Stop arguing like an old married couple!"

"WE'RE NOT ACTING LIKE AN OLD MARRIED COUPLE!" they both snapped.

"Scary," Lavi said rolling his eyes.

"Say Kanda!" Lenalee said turning to him with a smile. "How did you meet Alex-san?"

"Did she make a shrine dedicated to you after meeting you?" Lavi asked.

"Very funny Lavi," Lenalee said folding her arms. "Don't make fun of her affections no matter how unreasonable they are!"

"I beft Kavda 'as a def a tvin 'rother, deris no oder exbabation," Allen commented.

"Allen, don't talk with your mouth full! It's not polite," Lenalee noted.

"I don't want to talk about that," Kanda said taking a sour face.

"Oooh... Yuu is shy." Lavi teased.

"I TOLD YOU, DON'T CALL ME THAT!"

"Okay, okay, take it easy," Lavi said seeing Kanda's angry face right in front of him.

"I'm leaving," Kanda said knowing that his nerves were at their limits.

His pressed his fingers around the hold of his katana and took the way back to his room. The only thing he needed to do was find a way to get rid of his rather annoying "tail", after that everything would be fine again. Of course if something like that could happen so easily, then this fanfic would be over already.

Back in the cafe Allen and Lavi looked to one another, exchanging mischievous glances. Stalker-san's affection could prove to be very-very useful. After all, being in the Headquarters, doing nothing at all, wasn't all that appealing. And who could be a better victim for them than Kanda?

"We may regret it later but this is going to be fun," Lavi snickered.

"_Who_ is going to regret this?" Allen asked laughing in a rather evil way.

"Ah! Looks as though Black-Allen is emerging again," Lavi said sweat dropping.

"This is my chance to take my revenge for all these times he called me bean sprout through the whole series! AHAHAhaha! Ahahahahaha! Ahah-"

"I-I think that's enough Allen."

"Oh, that's right," Allen said, calming down.

"By the way, where is Alex-san now?" Lavi asked.

"Ah, actually I have no idea," Lenalee said blinking.

The truth was that while the others had occupied Kanda, Alex was doing something which was very likely to put her life at risk. As she was moving around the HQ, completely lost, she passed by the door to a room, from which really dark vibes were slipping out. She stopped in front of the door and looked at it anxiously.

"There is no mistaking it," she almost whispered gulping again. "This must be it...definitely..." she said placing her hand on the handle. "This definitely has to be...KANDA-SAN'S ROOM! KYA!" she cheered with cheeks turning red. "I know, I have to make his room beautiful for him and then...then..."

_'Alex-san...you did all this for me?'  
'Kanda-san, do not look at me with that lovely smile, it's too embarrassing…! It's was the least that I could do for you.'  
'Arigato Alex-san...for caring so much for me...'_

"Kya~! This will do~ This will do! I have to do this for Kanda-san!"

"Ano...Stalker-san?"

"Oh, Krory-san, what's the matter?" she asked ready to get in, as the door seemed to be _accidentally_ unlocked.

"Ah...this..this is Kanda's room, I don't think that going in there would be a very good idea, de aru."

"Ah, don't worry Krory-san! Yuu's room is the most warm and welcoming place in the world, I'm sure about it!" she said entering the room.

"No! Stalker-san, don't cross to the other side!" Krory called out.

"Ah, Krory-san, what's the matter?"

"Ah! Miranda-san! Stalker-san! Stalker-san entered into Kanda's room...And I...And I couldn't stop her" he said anxiously

"Ah!" Miranda gasped. "What can we do now?"

"I'm not sure, but Kanda will definitely not like it...!" he said agitated

In the meantime Alex was looking at Kanda's room blinking. She brought her hand to her mouth and gasped, moved.

"I knew that Kanda-san was sensitive, a flower lover can never be cold! Yosh! This place definitely needs a woman's hand! I'm going to make it nice and homely for him!"

A while later Kanda finally arrived in front of his door hoping to find peace, completely ignorant of what he was about to face. However the moment he was ready to open the door Krory and Miranda hold him back, much to his surprise.

"Please Kanda-san, don't go in," Miranda almost begged.

"Yes! Let's go and have a cup of tea, de aru," Krory nervously said

"I DON'T WANT TO!" Kanda said opening the door. "I want to go into my room..." he barked dragging Krory and Miranda alongside and they were hanging off of him.

But as soon as he entered into his room he stood on his stop dumbfound as flowers where everywhere, the sheets on his bed had a light color of blue, a new carpet was lying on the floor and bright light was illuminating the whole place. And on the top of that, the annoying one was standing in the middle of the room smiling brightly holding a broom.

"Welcome," she said giving a bright smile.

Kanda felt his blood boiling as his dark aura was growing more and more around him and his face was taking the form of an Oni. Krory and Mirada fell back and looked at each other anxiously.

"GET OUT!" he roared and his voice echoed throughout the HQ.

After that a wave of flowers along with other, random things, and Krory, Miranda and Alex flew out of Kanda's room and the door rumbled behind them. The same time Allen, Lavi and Lenalee were coming back from the cafeteria.

"What in the world happened here?" Lenalee asked.

"Stalker-san tried to..change Kanda's room," Miranda said sweat dropping.

"That wasn't a good idea, de aru," Krory added.

"It's okay...I guess it was too embarrassed because I saw his room. Kanda-san was full of energy so I bet he was really happy in his own, unique way," Alex said raising a hand.

"No, that's not it," everyone said in sync.

"Ahhh...isn't it?" she said and fell back with a weird look on her face.

"Alex-san, get hold of yourself," Lenalee said rolling her eyes.

Lavi and Allen looked at each other and sharing a light bulb while spark was coming out of their eyes. Two evil smiles were plastered on their faces.

"It'll be so much fun," they said in unison.

"What happened here? Why I'm not involved? Lenalee!" Komui called.

* * *

_**Next time: The first meeting! How did Kanda and Stalker-san first meet? The truth behind the not so intresting mystery! Also, what am I planning along with Lavi! Let our souls be saved from this fanfic!**_

**Note: Kanda's furniture received no damage, yet Komui did after getting on Lenalle's nerves because he complained way too much.**

_**See you again! (I hope)**_


	4. Hell 4

D. Gray Man belongs to Hoshino Katsura, we apologize for abusing her character

**Also a big thanks to Kin-Kitsune01 again, thanks for your beta**

**_I hope you'll like the part. Thanks to all of you you review or watch and even fave the story, it's really supportive._**

P.S. I can't wait for the new FMA series but this has nothing to do with this story

* * *

One day had past since the last incident. No one had dared to talk to Kanda as the dark vibes around him were sending chills down to everyone's spines. Allen, Lavi and Lenalee were looking at him from the other site of the room, keeping a safe distance between them. Even though they knew that they weren't at fault at all.

"Yuu looks like he is ready to kill someone," Lavi said nervously.

"Wrong Lavi, he seems ready to kill a specific someone," Allen said.

"This is crazy.. Poor Alex-san just wanted to make his room nice for him. Guys... They'll never understand the importance of having a woman's hand into their house," Lenalee said folding her hands.

"Lenalee, it's personal space we're talking about though, Kanda is right from a point of view," Lavi protested.

"I wonder how these two know each other anyway," Allen said drooling over his plate. "I can't imagine them being friends or anything like that."

"That's an interesting point. I was wondering about that too and Alex-san never said anything about it. Come, let's go and ask Kanda," Lenalee said.

"Are you crazy? Don't you value your life? I don't want to die trying to find out who these two met each other," Lavi said.

"Me neither, I have a meal to finish," Allen said and they turned back to their plates.

"You two are coming with me," Lenalee said with a dark expression and dragged them by their collars.

"What is _up_ with women? Why do we always have to do what they want?" Lavi complained.

Lenalee threw them both on the chairs opposite of Kanda and she, herself, sat next to them with a big smile on her face while the guys were growing muttering something between their teeth. Kanda raised an eyebrow and then sent them a death glare. His nerves were still in bad condition-worse than they usually were-and the idea of someone bugging him wasn't attractive at all.

"So Kanda," Lenalee started hustling both Allen and Lavi, making them put on a nervous smile. "We'd like to ask you something."

"Then ask and go," Kanda growled.

"We were wondering how you and Alex-san met," she said.

"Do you think that it's a good idea to ask about that?" he growled again.

"Come on Yuu, don't be that secretive, tell and," Lavi said and by the time he finished his words Kanda's sword were touching his throat. "Ehee. Take it easy Yuu."

"Don't call me by that name if you value your life."

"Come on Kanda, tell us your story," Allen said between munches.

Kanda looked at them narrowing his eyes. A vein trembled on his forehead, sign that he was hardly holding his nerves back. For a moment he argued with his self; should he just yell at them to make them leave him be? Or should he tell them about it? But, even he would make them go they would actually come back and bug him again thus he decided to actually tell them since they had already annoyed him with that.

"If I tell you will you stop being pests?" he asked

"Hey!" Lenalee tried to defend herself but Allen and Lavi covered her mouth.

"Sure," they said in unison.

Kanda sighed and crossed his legs folding his hands at the same time. Everyone was looking at him as for a moment he stayed silent with his eyes closed while awfully embarrassing memories were coming back.

"It was a few months ago," Kanda finally spoke. "I went in a mission with Tiedoll shishou."

"A mission?" Allen repeated.

"Can't you stay quiet?" Kanda growled.

"Ah..huh."

"Komui had given as the info. A scientist had notified the HQ that men were mysteriously disappearing from a motel. I was told that further details would be given to me when I go so I went.."

_Few months ago._

"Shishou. Is this that serious? Can't we just search for the Akuma?"

"Impatient as always Yuu-kun," Tiedoll laughed. "We're going to meet my friend today, his story is quite interesting."

"What? You mean that you already know?" Kanda asked.

"Of course, but not all the details," he laughed again.

Soon, they arrived at a house out of the town the disappearances were taking place. Tiedoll seemed to be familiar with the place. It was when a blonde man on his thirties appeared on the door with a big smile on his face.

"Ah, welcome Tiedoll-sama!" he welcomed.

"Thank you C.S.-kun."

"C.S.?" Kanda repeated blinking.

"Yes. I use my monogram and change it depending on the circumstances. Using the real name isn't always safe, but you can call me Carrey, if that's okay with you Kanda-kun," he said with a smile. "Please, come on in," he said. "You must be hungry."

"Hey, how do you know my name," Kanda asked.

"Tiedoll-sama told me of course. I'm glad you came after all, for the description Tiedoll-same gave I didn't think you would accept."

"Euh?"

"Come on Kanda-kun," Tiedoll said entering into the house.

"Welcome," a female voice said. "Thanks for helping my uncle."

A girl with dirty blonde hair was bowing in front of them making her long hair touch the ground. Professor Carrey placed a hand on her arm smiling.

"Alex, you don't have to be so formal, they are friends. This is my niece Alex, she is my assistant."

"Nice to meet you again Alex," Tiedoll said.

"Ah? Hai, same here sir," she said giving him a smile.

"This is Kanda Yuu, a student of mine, cute isn't he?" he asked placing a hand on Kanda's arm and Kanda let a growl. "I hope you two will get along."

"Nice to meet you," she said yet Kanda just turned his face away.

"He is a bit shy," Tiedoll said patting Kanda's back. "Young ones don't know how to act towards ladies."

"Please, take a sit," Prof. Carrey said.

Kanda and Tiedoll waited on the table as Prof. Carrey entered into his room. He returned holding a bunch of newspapers which he put down in front of them. They took one each in their hands and scanned through the print on the pages.

"It's all about the disappearances," Carrey said. "It's been going on for about a month now."

"And what was that weird thing you were talking about."

"First, all of them are men," he said. "Not one woman had disappeared. Plus, as the newspaper say they were all just married and were on their honey moon. In addition to this they all disappeared while they were in the love motel with their wives."

"So what, couldn't they have just run away from them? They could have regretted it," Kanda noted.

"That could actually be true," Carrey laughed. "But, all of them? It's weird isn't it? I, also, thought of it at first. After all, people tend to follow what others do like ships in a lot ways. Why not this time as well? One runs away, all run away. However I still wanted to check, so I visited the motel last week. I stayed there for a day. The truth is that nothing weird happened. However, I heard a rumour," he said smirking.

"A rumour?" Kanda repeated.

"Yes, a rumour. A rumour that the motel was cursed. According to people around, only those who truly love each other can leave the motel together."

"There is a dead man, isn't that what you think C.S.-kun?" Tiedoll asked.

"Exactly. So I asked people around about the past owners of the motel. It wasn't hard to make them talk about it. This is the woman who owns the motel," he said pointing at a photo. She lost her husband 3 months ago while they were newly wed. People said that she is a really strong woman and after a short period of mourning she started running the motel again."

"So, you think that she is an Akuma?" Kanda asked.

"Yes, but I have no proof for that. I observed her the time I visited the motel but I found nothing abnormal on her, which means, that the reason of the disappearances may be something else. So I thought that we should investigate it once again with better conditions, from the inside."

"That could help, should we rent a room?" Kanda asked.

"Excuse me, I brought the tea!" the girl interrupted them. "Would you like a cup of tea sir?" she asked after serving the others and Kanda nodded.

"So, shisou, should we leave !" Kanda yelled in pain. "What are you doing? My pan-my pants are."

"I'm sorry! I was careless!" she said bowing. "Please let me sweep it."

"No, what are you doing?" he said trying to push her away.

"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry," she said while Tiedoll and Carrey where laughing hard.

"Kanda-kun, I guess you'll need a change of my clothes," Carrey said.

"Obviously," Kanda said.

"Come," Carrey said going towards his room.

Carrey handed him a change of clothes smiling and left the room. Surprisingly the clothes fit perfectly on him. Kanda sat on the bed for a moment. He had a weird feeling that Tiedoll was planning something; he was more cheerful than usual and that Prof. Carrey had a similar expression on his face.

"Kanda-kun! The meal is ready!" Tiedoll called.

Kanda sighed and exited the room. The table was ready, indeed, and four warm plated were on it. Kanda raised an eyebrow and sat next to Tiedoll.

"Tempura?" he asked.

"Yes, tempura," Tiedoll replied.

"I hope that it will suit your taste, Kanda-kun," Carrey said.

"_Itadakimasu_," they said.

"Carrey-sensei, do you have any other clues that an Akuma may be involves in the case? Or it's all just your theory?"

"Ah. It is. They found a dead man about a week ago. His face was completely ruined though and they couldn't recognize him," he said smiling.

Kanda looked at his plate as it somehow seemed to loose its taste. That Professor was weird, which made Kanda wonder if all of them were weird as Komui's image popped into his mind. Also, that smiles of his started to look really creepy.

"Of course that doesn't prove anything either, since the victim didn't carry an identity on him as he was wearing. He was wearing a robe, which didn't help much as well. But. Alex recognised him somehow. That man had a scar on his hand.."

"Euh?" Tiedol vocalized and turned to her. "Did you know him Alex-san."

"Not really. I've met him along with his wife. They had asked me for directions for a place to eat. They said that they were on honey moon," she said looking down. "He has scratched the back of his head nervously that day, that's why I noticed the scar..They were looking really happy."

"So, it's obviously a murder, Akuma might indeed be involved," Kanda commented.

"Kanda-kun." Tiedoll sighed.

"What is it shishou?"

"Nothing," he said smiling. "Let's enjoy our meal for now, we'll tell you about the plan later."

"The plan?" Kanda asked narrowing his eyes.

"You'll see, it's nothing really hard, don't worry," Tiedoll said with his smile not leaving his face.

Yet, after the meal, Tiedol and Professor Carrey locked their selves into Carrey's research room and Kanda was left there along with a girl he didn't know. On the top of that she was acting really nervous as she was moving around gathering the plates and cleaning the table.

"Is there something you would like sir?" she asked when she finally finished.

"Not really," he said and a silence followed.

"Thanks for helping my uncle," she said after a while.

"That's my job," he said and silence followed again.

"My uncle said that exorcists' work is really hard, you must be really brave to risk your life everyday. He is trying to help with the way he can, I'd like to help too that's why I became his apprentice," she said smiling.

"I don't care," he said and they stayed silent again.

"Sorry ab-"

"You're annoying."

"..I'm sorry."

_'What the hell are they doing in there?'_ Kanda thought. _'What if there is innocence around? What if the akuma strike again? Is that really okay to stay here doing nothing? Che... I wonder what they are planning.'_

"Did you wait for long Kanda-kun?" Carrey's voice snapped him out of his thought.

"What's the plan? I don't have time to fool around."

"Oh, you're really straight forward, aren't you?" he chuckled.

"Che."

"Since you're that impatient. Tiedoll-sama, should I do the honours?" he asked.

"Sure."

"Alex-chan, this is your husband," he said pointing at Kanda.

"Euh?" she let a surprised noise.

"WHAT?" Kanda asked even more surprised standing up.

* * *

"EUH?" Allen, Lavi and Lenalee exclaimed in real time.

"Husband?" Lavi said.

"Kanda... Don't tell me, you're actually married?" Allen asked.

"Of course not beansprout!" Kanda angrily said. "Just shut up and listen to the rest of the story!"

"Ah, it's getting more and more interesting!" Lenalee said excited.

"What?" Kanda growled.

"I mean go on."

* * *

"Relax Kanda-kun, it's simpler than it sounds," Prof. Carrey said.

"You just don't know what you're talking about," Kanda said.

"Kanda, it's a part of the mission you know," Tiedoll said.

"Getting married to someone can never be a part of a mission," he growled.

"That's true, but what about pretending to be engaged or married?" Prof. Carrey said.

"Euh?"

"Come Kanda-kun, it's simple, really simple. You'll just go and rent a room as a happy lovely-dovely couple, observe things there and find the akuma. If my theory is actually right the akuma might try to attack you as well, it won't be that hard for you to destroy it, will be? Or are you afraid that you won't be able to accomplish the mission given to you?"

"Che.." he hesitated for a moment. "What about her then? What if the akuma actually attacks her. It won't be safe you know."

"You will be there, won't you? Plus, Alex-san, do you mind pretending to be Kanda-kun's wife-to-be?"

"Euh? Hu-uh," she said shaking her head blushing.

"What are you blushing about?" Kanda asked sweat dropping.

"It's decided then! Let's try to make you two look more like a couple. Kanda-san, we have a lot of work to do with you!" Tiedoll said with a big smile on his face.

_'Don't tell me, you're really enjoying that old man, don't you?'_

* * *

"Don't tell me that you actually accepted that," Allen interrupted again laughing hard.

"Yuu getting married - it sounds so ridiculous," Lavi laughed along.

"Guys, it's not a laughing matter," Lenalee said trying hard to laugh her own laugh back.

"It's not funny," Kanda growled.

"Of course it's not," Lenalee said and the guys started laughing even harder.

"Lenalee! What's happening here! Why are you alone with these guys laughing. Lenalee, you never laugh with onii-san's jokes!" Komui cried, attaching his self on Lenalee.

"Ah. It's late, it's late, we have to go and rest. Kanda, tell us about the rest tomorrow, we promise we won't laugh," Allen said dragging Lavi with him.

"But it's too soo-"

"Haha, but you're tired Lavi, can't you feel it?" Allen said covering Lavi's mouth and the rest were looking at them blinking.

"Allen, what are you doing?" Lavi asked. "I wanted to know about the rest of the story."

"Forget about that for now," Allen said and a big evil smile appeared on his face. "Tell me Lavi, remember the plan to _**help **_Kanda with his hell?"

"Euh? Yeah."

"Well, I just had a great idea," he said letting out an evil laugh. "Let's make an unforgettable memory for Kanda. And us as well. That's for calling me beansprout all the time," he said laughing.

"I kinda have a bad feeling about this."

"Staaa-lker-san!" Allen called with a sing-sang voice and an innocent smile on his face which made Lavi sweatdrop.

"Hai, Walker-san. Can I help you with something?"

"No, but I can. You see, I saw how you were treated by Kanda the other day and I really sympathise you," he said placing a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm sure he just over-reacted, I should have asked him first. I am sure that he actually likes flowers. He is really kind after all."

"Yes, I definitely agree with you. Kanda is a bit shy."

"Ah, you must know him really well Walker-san, I'm really envious," she said blushing.

"Yep, that's why I know what will definitely please Kanda," Allen said with a big smile on his face.

'Allen, what are you planning? I hope we will not end up dead after this plan of yours...' Lavi thought.

* * *

**Next time: It's time for my revenge! Wait to see my awesome plan! Also, Kanda tells us more about how he met Stalker-san. Next time, my big time! Let our souls be saved from this pitiful fanfic.**

_**When you're fangirling(does this word even exist) beware of the other fangirls around you, you never know when they will pass the limits.**_


	5. Hell 5

D. Gray Man belongs to Hoshino Katsura, we apologize for abusing her character.

**Thanks to Kin-Kitsune01 for the beta! Love ya Kin-san ^o^**

**To those who messaged about it, I know that the flower in Kanda's room isn't real, yet there would be no story if I hadn't made it 'visible' into the story. It's comedy people, just comedy XD Sorry for changing the fact.**

**Also it's been a long time since I last updated so thanks for keeping up with me, I hope you'll enjoy the part. **

**About DGM's (awesome) latest chapter: I hope that since Kanda said that he can't die till he finds that man, he won't die now that he eventually found him.**

Take care!

* * *

Lavi watched Allen while Allen was whispering something to Alex's ear making her blush. He blinked as he wasn't able to figure out what his-partner-in-crime was planning. The silver haired boy gave a big 'innocent' smile. Shoujo effects filled the background and Alex's face became red.

"Ah.. That's so embarrassing." she said. "But I guess you know Kanda-san better than me. " She added lacing her hands in front of her chest.

"Yeah, I do," Allen declared with a big smile. "I know him very well. I know him better than my own hand."

_"Don't try so hard to be convincing,"_ Lavi mumbled looking at his friend.

"I guess I can't help it. This time would come sooner or later," she said blushing more and more. "Kanda-san. He is so shy."

"Hm. And he really likes surprises!" Allen added.

"Ah! I didn't know that! I thought it was the opposite!" she said surprised.

"Trust me Alex-san. I'm a guy, I know." Allen said placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Allen. What in the world are you planning to do? Make sure that it won't give us much trouble. Kanda is in really bad mood lately," Lavi whispered to him giving a nervous smile to Alex at the same time.

"Thank you Allen-san, you're a great help," she said bowing. "I'll see you later."

"Allen, what did you tell her?" Lavi asked.

"Don't worry Lavi, I'm just trying to turn Kanda into a man," Allen said and his gentle smile turned into a demonic one. "I'm just that good, ain't I? Hahahaha-HAHAHAHAHA"

Allen's demonic laugh echoed into the HQ, making Lavi jump and little. He looked at his friend nervously trying to figure him out.

"Allen, somehow this side of yours is scarier than Kanda's usual behaviour."

"Just wait until tomorrow."

Naturally, the next day Lenalee dragged the guys along with her to find out about the rest of the story. Kanda sat on the opposite side of the room folding his hands. Not only he had to deal with that odd stalker, but he had to recall that embarrassing mission. That was enough to make him bitter.

"So, what happened next Kanda?"

"Well." Kanda said with the corner of his lips twitching as the awful memories started rushing back to him.

* * *

"Come on Kanda-kun, it's not that hard." Tiedol said with a smile. "What's this?"

"A jar of honey."

"So say the word looking at Alex-chan."

"Ho-ho-hon-hon-hoooo-ne-hoon-eyyyyy."

"Okay, that's a kind of a progress," Tiedoll said, sweat dropping. "Now, look at Alex-chan and say it again," Tiedoll said with a big smile plastered on his face.

"I don't want to," Kanda stubbornly said.

"Come on, it's not that hard! Alex-chan, why don't you try to say your part?" Tiedoll asked.

"Euh. Okay... Um. What would you like to do, honey?" smiling nervously

"See? It's not that hard," Tiedoll said.

"Show off," Kanda muttered looking at her, making Alex blink. "What-Whatever you want, ho-That's ridiculous! What's with these cheesy lines and the word "honey" in the end of every single sentence?!?" Kanda snapped. "There is no need for this word there."

"Come on, practice-practice." Tiedoll said. "That's why we call it _honey _moon."

The door opened and Prof. Carrey entered with a troubled expression on his face, holding a newspaper in his hands. After taking off his coat, he put the newspaper down on the table and sat next to Tiedoll.

"We had another one this week and the local newspapers try to cover up things. What really troubles me though, is that they have not found the bodies. Except of that one poor man with the scar, all the others have merely disappear from the face of the earth. Plus, his wife isn't in a good-state, so I could not reach her to question her."

"Can't we just search for the Akuma? This is ridiculous; we're staying here doing these stupid things while that Akuma is running around killing."

"Well, it's not that simple.." Prof. Carrey said. "Please, follow my ways. Whenever Exorcists came to eliminate the Akumas I found, many unfortunate people died in the progress," he continued with a serious face. "So, if the Black Order wants my help, I expect them to at least follow my way, so other people won't get hurt as well."

"Professor Carrey studies Akuma and can predict the places they appear, plus he can judge if it's a real Akuma case based on past cases. He has a really good eye for this kind of matter." Tiedoll said.

"Kanda-kun. Do you think that's it's better to save one person and kill 10 more in the progress to protect one?" Prof. Carrey asked.

"Of course not." Kanda said looking away.

"Then listen to me, there are people in this inn, if you're going to randomly attack there, other people might get killed by akuma as well."

"That's true. So, let's continue. What did I miss?" he asked.

"You two are really enjoying this, aren't you?" Kanda barked.

"Kind of," they said in unison grinning.

"Kanda can't say the word honey," Tiedoll said.

"Pitiful boy, the most useful word for a man. I was expecting more of you, Kanda-kun," Carrey said with an expression of sympathy on his face.

"Don't look at me like that! It won't work on me, I won't say this kind of ridiculous things," Kanda said.

* * *

"Did you actually say them at the end?" Allen asked.

"Don't interrupt me beansprout!" Kanda snapped.

"Continue with the story!" Lenalee interfered, interrupting the upcoming fight.

* * *

Two days later, both of them were standing out of the motel holding their luggage. Kanda's face was looking scarier than usual, as he was trying to force a smile on his face; he ended up looking more like an insane killer. The girl next to him was blushing and looking at the place with bright eyes, like she was really on her honeymoon. The whole picture was quite odd, and quite a few people had looked at them blinking while they were heading to the inn.

"We have to go in, Kanda-san," she said opening the door.

"I already know that!" he said, hesitating like he would really become a married man if he would make one step in that place.

"Excuse us!" someone said behind them.

"Hah?" Kanda raised an eyebrow.

Kanda turned behind him with a death glare, only to see the one who dared to bother him at such a difficult time. A young couple smiled at him nervously, after seeing his face. They were about 20-22 years old. The woman waved at him, clinching her husband's arm, and tried to give them a smile.

"Are you newly weds too?" she asked trying to make up a conversation.

"Yes. We came here for our honey moon," Alex said with a smile.

"Ah, just like us," the girl said smiling at her.

"Isn't it great?" the guy asked Kanda. "Being with the one you love. My wife and I were childhood friends and now..."

"_Is he an idiot? Why should I care about what he has to say?"_ Kanda thought as the man kept talking. "_I just want to finish with this... Che! I'll never go on a mission, without taking all the details first, again_." he thought moodily.

Kanda turned around, ignoring the man, and entered inside carrying the luggage, going straight to the reception. A woman with long blond dirty hair welcomed him. Kanda looked at her nervously for a moment.

"We-ah-where-where are you..ho-hooo-neeee-y?" he asked looking around.

"Ah, excuse me," Alex said rushing to the reception and stood next to him smiling. "We have already booked a room. Mr and Mrs Kudo," she said. "Isn't that right honey?" she asked.

"Ah, yes, hooo-ho-ne-yyy..," Kanda made a fast note to cross the damn word out of his vocabulary after that.

"Ah, I see, your husband is a bit nervous, you should look more happy with a sweet wife like this one by your side" the receptionist said after a pause. "Room 13, this is the key," she added smiling and handed the key to him.

Kanda took the key like he was taking the first step towards his death sentence.

"You should appreciate these moments," the receptionist added turning to him. "Enjoy your honey moon."

"I will." he said turning for the luggage "_Not._" He mumbled.

"Thanks for the key." Alex uttered bowing.

"Come, I want to get rid of this luggage," Kanda said. "Don't fool around."

"Sure! Can we go sightseeing after that?" she asked.

"We didn't come here for sightseeing. Let's drop the luggage in the room for a start," he said. "12. 13.. Here. Room 13." he said. "Open the door."

"Hai. Excuse me," she said opening the door.

Kanda entered inside and set the luggage down, frowning. All that seemed to be way too unnecessary. Yet, one more thing fell like a thunder to him! Something he didn't thought before, surprisingly, while it should be the first thing he should have like an argument to not use this way of doing things. His eyes opened wide and cold sweat ran down his spine.

"A double?!?" he cried looking at the bed. "A double?" he repeated going straight to the door.

"Where are you going, Kanda-san?"

"A double?" he repeated once again. "And it's Kudo here!"

"O-okay. I'll change!" she said while Kanda exited the room and rushed downstairs.

He slammed his hands on the reception desk, making the receptionist jump on her spot. His face hadn't looked more nervous before, plus the whole idea had made him panic. The receptionist looked at him blinking for a moment and then smiled lacing her hand in front of her belly.

"Can I be of any use?" she asked titling her head.

"The bed.." Kanda said with a husky voice. "The bed is a double. Why the bed is a double?"

"Em. Because it has to be like this.." The woman said.

"Why?" Kanda repeated.

"Em..." The woman leaned to him and whispered to his ear. "Couples sleep together and make love you know."

"Euh?" Kanda vocalized rolling his eyes.

"It's when the boy and the girl-"

"I know what it is!" Kanda hissed jerking back. "You don't have to tell me!"

"Oh, I see, it must be your first time. You're too innocent," the woman chuckled.

"That's none of your business!" Kanda barked feeling embarrassed and rushed upstairs. "Really, how didn't I think of this thing? Shiishou and the happy-go-lucky scientist are, definitely, enjoying their selves right now," he mumbled and opened the door furiously.

"AAAAAAH!" a scream filled the room.

Random things came flying towards him. Kanda's eyes rolled standing at the door frozen, while the girl was trying to cover up her self, blushing madly. That was the last thing he would wish for that moment, also his luck seemed to turn from bad to worse these days.

"You're wearing your underwear for God's sake," he said and slammed the door behind him feeling his cheeks burning.

He felt a pair of eyes looking at him intensively. Kanda swipe his eyebrows and turned his head abruptly to his right. There was standing a man, the same one he met few minutes ago. The guy looked at him surprised and smiled nervously.

"What are you looking at?"

"No. Em. I didn't mean to. I... It's okay, I understand, it's going to be our first time as well, if that comforts you," he said.

"Huh? Are you an idiot? Why I should care about that?"

"No, I-"

"Should I say, do your best or something like that? Do I look like I'm having fun here?" Kanda asked staring at him as his anger was accumulating inside him.

"No! It's okay! You don't have to say anything!" the man said scared to death. "I'll leave you alone, don't worry," he said getting into his room.

"Che." he mumbled and knocked the door. "I'll enter now," he announced and opened the door.

"Sorry for that, honey," she said bowing.

"Huh? Don't call me honey when we're alone!" Kanda barked.

"But, what if they are watching us?" she asked blinking.

"If they were watching us, we'd probably be killed by now," Kanda said opening his luggage. "Anyway, now that we're alone you have to follow my orders since it's your first time doing this."

"That's..." she said blushing. "I'll be in your care," she added bowing.

"Euh?" Kanda blinked for a moment. "I'm talking about the mission you idiot, what the hell were you thinking?!" he barked releasing how she interpreted it.

"I'm sorry!" she apologized.

"Always follow what I say, don't go off or do anything on your own, if you hear anything wierd just tell me and while you're at it, don't get any _weird ideas_. Understood?"

"Yes, sir!" she said smiling.

"_What's with this smile? It gets on my nerves,"_ Kanda thought.

"I'll the right side of the bed," he said ready to change.

"Okay," she said blushing.

A pause followed..

"I'm going to change, turn around damn it!"

"I'm sorry!" she said startled and turned around immediately.

_"All of this pisses me off, it really pisses me off!" _he thought changing his clothes.

"It's such a pity that you're not wearing your clothes from the Order, I really like them!"

"Don't you think that I would stand out with them, something I can't do because of this idiotic plan," Kanda said.

"Ah, that's true."

"You can turn around now," he said.

"Don't you dare came to my side of the bed," he said laying on it.

"I'll try!" she said balling her first with determination.

* * *

"You mean that you really slept with her?" Allen asked trying to hold back his laugh.

"Yuu sharing a bed with a girl, that's just cracking," Lavi fall down laughing. "I can imagine his face!"

"It's not a laughing matter!" Kanda barked.

"That's right guys, let him continue with the story," Lenalee said trying not to laugh but they weren't going to stop.

"Okay, I'm out of here," Kanda said standing up.

"Continue with your story tomorrow, Kanda-san," Lenalee called out to him as he was leaving.

"Idiots," Kanda muttered pissed going directly to his room. "Finally, some peace," he said opening the door.

He entered inside huffing but the image he confronted made his blood rise. That girl was kneeling on his bed covered only with sheets and blushing like crazy.

"_Kanda-san, please be gentle_," she said.

"Ge-GET OUT OF HERE!" he said throwing her out of his room (along with the sheet and the pillow).

"What's happening?" Lenalee asked seeing her being thrown out of his room.

"Lenaleeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Komui called at the same time running towards his sister.

Lenalee rolled her eyes watching her falling on him. Alex screamed and slapped Komui while covering her self calling him pervert making him to loose consciousness, Allen was laughing hard and everyone else stood there confused.

"And take these with you!" Kanda barked again throwing out her clothes.

A shoe found her head as a target and she passed out as well.

"Allen, your plan was dangerous, yet this scene is so-- hahaha" Lavi laughed along with Allen.

"Do you mean that you two were behind this?" Lenalee asked with a big smile on her face.

"Yeah, I can't stop laughing," Allen responded to Lavi's comment.

"I see," Lenalee said.

In the end, neither Allen or Lavi escaped unpunished.

"That's for fooling around with a woman's innocence," Lenalee commented leaving them unconscious too.

* * *

**Next Time: Kanda continues with his story. What happened while preteting to be on honey moon? Will Stalker-san strike again? Find out when this lazy amature writer decide to update again. Let are souls be saved for this lousy comedy!**

**_Kanda's pillow was retrieved later._**


	6. Hell 6

**Hi there, it's been a reeeeaaaally long time, isn't it? I make this come back without a beta reader. It would be kind of rude to ask for that after losing contact for so long, so go easy on me. I tried not to be very careless this time, but there should be mistakes here and there.**

* * *

"NO!" Kanda folded his arms.

Lenalee frowned. She was bugging him for about a week in order to convince him to continue the narration of the story, but he kept refusing. Things had come to that because Allen and Lavi had decided to play that prank on him, there was obviously no one else to blame. Allen and Lavi smiled nervously as a response to Lenalee's glare.

"Come on, Kanda. Don't you want to share this with us?" she asked again with the sweetest smile she could give.  
"Not really. I shouldn't have told you about this story at first place anyway," he scowled.

Nothing seemed to work on him. She could ask Alex, but then she was sure that the story would be full of delusions and the story would end completely distorted. Kanda of course was aware of that and since there was no other source he had the pleasure to have them beg him if they wanted to find out the rest.

"You are no fun," Lavi said. "I wanted to find out more about your first night with her."  
"Maybe Kanda did this and that and he is all embarrassed," Allen added with an innocent face.

Kanda's face flushed. Not only they had set up the whole thing last week but they had the audacity to actually refer to him like he was somebody who would actually do such a thing while on duty. He could feel his temperature rising from frustration and his fists slammed on the table. Allen and Lavi rolled their eyes and looked at him surprised.

"What did you say?" he asked.

Not only they could feel how angry Kanda was, but they could clearly see Lenalee's "look what you have done" glare. The situation didn't look good from them at all. Kanda finally stood up and walked away after giving them an angry look. He didn't stop until he slammed the door of his room behind him, knowing that the trio had definitely followed him.

Eventually, he left his self for on his bed and let out a deep sigh. The fact that he hadn't leaved the headquarters the latest days had made the situation more stressful and was driving him crazy. That girl was popping up from nowhere, making him feel embarrassed in front of his subordinates and on the top of that he didn't have the chance to let his anger on something.

"It's not like it's not embarrassing to tell them a story like this," he mumbled.

Just recalling the memories from that time was embarrassing enough. Plus, he knew that Allen and Lavi wouldn't let the chance pass by and they would certainly make fun of situations. Even with that thought only, he wanted to struggle them both. He took his pillow and then threw it forcefully at the door. He could clearly hear them whispering outside.

"What was Master thinking, really," he groaned. "I can't take anymore of this."

"_It will be fun_," he had said.

Going back to what happened that night, to him it wasn't fun at all. After changing their clothes, they had to share the same bed, the whole situation was really awkward, he couldn't relax to the least and he was lying there holding Mugen tightly. It would be alright if the situation had stayed just like that, but soon it had to become much more awkward than it should be.

Maybe the motel was too old or just the walls were too thin, but they could clearly hear the voices of the couple who rent the room next to them. Kanda's left eyes had twitched and his whole body had felt tensed as the man's words echoed into his ears.

"_I… It's ok, I understand. It's going to be our first time too, if that comforts you."_

He had felt his cheeks burning before he realizes. He was a man and a warrior, but he couldn't help but feel embarrassed with the thought. After all, he was alone with a girl in a room of a cheap motel and they had no other choice but to listen to those inappropriate noises. He just had to wait for their voices to abate and everything would be fine, or that just what he had thought.

"It's such a nice motel, right? Hehehe," she commented with an anxious tone in her voice.

"_What are you making a conversation for in such an awkward situation?" _he thought. _"And don't hehehe me."_

"The bed is so soft and all," she carried on. "And the weather was pretty good today too, it really feels like honeymoon. Well, I mean… it's not like I…"

"_You are making it even more awkward, can't you feel it? Honestly, you… euh? I could swear that. . ."_

Kanda threw away the blanket and stood up going towards the door tiptoeing. He opened the door slightly, trying to make as less sound as he could. He was confident that he had seen a light passing by. He puckered up, trying to close the door without making a sound. What was the meaning of that?

"Mr. Kanda, what happened?" he heard a whisper behind him.

A goosebump ran down his spine and he turned furiously to cover her mouth. The girl gave him a surprised look and he turned to check if there was anyone in the corridor immediately. Only after he assured himself that nobody was there he let her mouth loose.

"What were you thinking? Don't let your bed like that, especially if I don't tell you to."  
"I wanted to know what happened. Was it something serious? You acted strange for a moment."  
"First, don't go around calling me by my real name," he whispered. "Understood?"  
"Yes, I'm sorry," she apologized. "Did something disturb you?"  
"I thought I saw a light passing by. The owner of the hotel should have finished checking the room hours ago and I didn't hear anyone leaving its room. Also I should be able to do so, since the voices settled down," he added.  
"The light passed by shortly after the voices stopped, right?" she asked.  
"Yes, exactly," he answered. 'Hey, don't tell me that you were actually paying attention," he asked feeling his self blushing once again.

"_What's wrong with me, really?" _

"It was hard not to do so," she responded turning red. "Ah, don't tell me," she said looking up dumbstruck. "Could it be… Someone was peeking at the couple next door? That's gross" she shuttered.  
"Euh?" Kanda turned red feeling uptight. "Something like this… As it could be something like this!"  
"Mr. Honey, don't raise your voice."  
"I'm sorry," he hissed turning his back to her. "Anyway, don't do this again. You won't leave the bed again unless I tell you, got it?"  
"Got it," she said and nodding in agreement.  
"And ? What was that?" he asked.  
"Well…" she started looking away embarrassed. "I forgot Mr. Kudo's name, so I decided to go with Mr. Honey instead."  
"Are you serious?" he asked puzzled.

Kanda covered his face with his palm trying to figure out how he would be able to deal with that girl and walked to his bed again. She followed him and soon they were both covered with the blanket once again. Luckily the tension had fallen a bit.

"Goodnight," she said. "And sorry about that."  
"Well, whatever, " he mumbled. "….It's Yuuta. My Master picked it. You are Alea, don't forget them again."

"_Now that I think about it, they didn't put much thought on them, did they?"_ he thought.

"Mr. Yuuta…" she hesitantly said after a short pause.  
"What is it now?"  
"Do you think that they are going to peek on us as well? We are supposed to be newly webbed after all."  
"Just sleep!" Kanda hissed.  
"Sorry…"

What kind of thought was that? However, what if that was the case? What kind of perverted mind would do something like that? That light didn't stop to bug him though. How many people were spending their night there except of them and the couple next door? They should be 3 or 4, excluding the owner. 3 of them were males, one of them was a woman who was accompanying one of them

All of the victims were males. Should he consider that woman a possible victimizer? Could it be that she was bringing her victims there before she finish them off or that she was targeting the males in that motel? But that had to be the work of an akuma anyway. Or maybe it was too soon to make assumptions? Why the victims were males only. Were there any clues they were missing?

"What is it now?" he asked feeling her hand resting on him.

No responce. Kanda snorted blatantly irritated and raised his body a bit to face her clearly in order to chide her only to see that she was fast asleep. Moreover she had already entered his side of the bed breaking their agreement.

"What are you doing?" he mumbled and tried to push her back. "Holly..."

Kanda found his self embraced and unable to find a safe way to escape. One wrong move and she would wake up and jump into conclusions. He definitely didn't want that. However, the idea of having someone so close to him, rubbing against his skin the whole night wasn't very tempting either. Of course, she had a young woman right next to him, but that didn't change things to the least in his mind.

"Women are like spiders," he mumbled. "I'm a warrior; I won't fall for their tricks. Endure it..." he said trying to close his eyes. "_This isn't helping at all_," he cried inside him. _"Ok, I have no other choice. I have only one chance. Here we go!" _he gulped and pushed her away.

Well... maybe a little too hard because few seconds later she was on the floor trying to stand up whilerubbing her head. She was asking for it anyway, he wasn't obliged to play the lovely husband even on bed and to concede in this kind of couple-things even if she was doing them during her sleep.

"What happened?" she asked half-asleep.  
"Nothing... you fell off the bed," he said looking away.  
"Oh, sorry for waking you up," she said smiling.  
"Goodnight," he said turning his back to her. _"It's not like I lied. I didn't say she fell on her own. I'm not going to say sorry and I'm getting so out of character right now..."  
_"Goodnight."

And that first night seemed like a hell. The next morning wasn't any different. When he woke up he found his self way too close to her or more specifically right next to her and both of them were facing each other. Much to his exaggerated reaction to that and her surprise when he let out a cry, they ended up on the floor in an awkward position. At that time he felt a great urge to commit seppuku on the spot.

"Mr. Kudo," she said blushing. "I wouldn't know... you are so wild," she said looking away blushing.  
"Don't perceive everything in that way!" he snapped.

"Mr. and Mrs. Kubo is everything ok?" the owner asked and entered quickly after a knock.

An awkward silent followed...

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry. I heard a cry and a loud noise and I thought something bad had happened. I was worried so... because of those murders. I hadn't imagined... I'm sorry again, sorry for interrupting you..." she said quickly and exited the room closing the door behind her.  
"No, it's not-"

He didn't have the change to explain and there was no point to. They were supposed to be a couple after all. He just sat on the floor, with his hair covering his face and his hand supporting his body, trying to regain composure.

_"Is this some kind of trial? Are they testing me?"_ he questioned his self.

"Mr. Kudo..."  
"What is it again?"  
"Ehh... nothing."  
"Good," he said and stood up. "Dress up then."  
"Not in front of me!"  
"O-Okay..."  
"Get behind the curtain..."  
"Em... Mr. Kudo... do you think that the owner took a glimpse of the curtain when she entered?" she asked from behind the curtain.  
"Let's hope not..." Kanda answered after a pause. "If she asks you anything about it, just make up and excuse."  
"Can I tell her that you were emba-"  
"Why should you tell her that I was the one feeling embarrassed about that? You are supposed to be the shy newlywed wife."  
"Oh, I see."

Kanda buttoned up his shirt and took Mugen into his hands. He could put his sword into the guitar-case he had brought with him, but he had a bad feeling about this. What if someone was asking him to play the guitar? What would he do then? Going out unarmed was out of question too and he couldn't let Mugen behind anyway. So, after Professor's suggestion he covered Mugen with a fake sheath to look like a normal sword so he could carry him around using the recent murders as an excuse. That was the best option he had after all.

"I'm going first," he announced and left the room.

"Oh! Goodmorning!" the man from next door saluted him.

"_My luck is really bad these days, wrong, extremely bad_," he thought and tried to walk away.

"So, how are you today?"  
"I'm fine."  
"Me too!"  
_"I didn't ask you..."  
_"It's great to be married, don't you think so?" the man asked.  
"I suppose."  
"So," he continued lowering his voice and put an arm around Kanda's neck. "Tell me..."  
_"Does he want to die that badly?"  
_"How did it go? Last night."  
_"He really wants to die. When did we become buddies?"  
_"You looked nervous last night too. Ah... It's so nice to be a man."  
_"You just want to show off, you jerk."  
_"So?"  
"Well, my wife thinks that a cheap motel doesn't suit such an important moment. As I man who is able not to hold back his urges I was able to respect that," Kanda said trying to sound as convincing as he could.  
"...Heeh... I'm not buying that," he said.  
"What do you mean?" Kanda asked and stopped walking abruptly.  
"I heard the owner. She interrupted you while you were in the middle of something, right?" he said with a grin.  
"That-"  
"You just have to relax a bit. Don't be so uptight. It's your woman after all. Look at her," he said pointing at his young wife who was waiting at the reception hall. 'She is the woman who will become the mother of my kids on day. There is no reason to be nervous around her."  
_"This fluffy atmosphere is making me sick."  
_"I'll see you around! Let's go on a walk together later!" he said a d ran to her side.

"Kanda~ Just come out already and tell us about the story. Don't go reminiscing things all by yourself!" Allen called from outside the room. "It's unfair!"  
"Allen is right! Our appearances were decreased too!"  
"Shut up already!" Kanda barked from inside the room.  
"That's how he is... always," Allen said.

**To be continued…**

* * *

**Next time: Kanda keeps reminiscing alone in order to reduce the time we appear even more. The troubles in his mission keep growing and this experience as a newly webbed was really bad for his stomach. Let our souls be saved from bad food.**

**Look forward to the next chapter!**

_**Kanda's pillow was later retrieved yet again.**_


	7. Hell 7

**It's been a while again, hello and thanks for reading. I hope that I will be able to finish the story in about 3-4 chapters after this one.**

* * *

Kanda was forced to come out of his room due to everyone's persistence. Though, Kanda himself, could not understand why they were interested in the details since they could already mock him even without knowing the whole story; whilst it was obvious they could tease him more that way and that was the only reason.

"Fine! Fine! I said I will continue!" Kanda barked. "So, stop pestering me!"  
"Continue the story from the point you left it in the previous chapter," Allen proposed.  
"What?"  
"Yuu!" a familiar voice called.  
"Not again," Kanda said pinching the bridge of his nose.  
"Hello, Alex," Lenalee greeted. "How come you are here?"  
"Oh, hello!" Alex greeted back.  
"Hi!" Allen and lavi greeted I unison.  
"Actually, I had a break so I thought that I should come and say hi to Yuu," she explained. "And this way I can give him his present as well," she added pointing at a bag she was holding.

"Oh, a present for Kanda? I'm dying to see that," Allen said. "Lavi, what do you think it is?"  
"Oh, extra shampoo supplies?" Lavi replied hesitantly.  
"I'll kill you," Kanda grunted.  
"Relax," Lavi tittered. "I was kidding."  
"Actually..." Alex said and picked up something from inside the bag.

At the view of Kanda's, full with love, present everyone had to hold back their reaction, trying hard not to laugh. Kanda's face changed many shades of red, so many that they could not tell if it was from anger or embarrassment; although the first option was the most likely to be the right answer.

There she was holding a fine T-shirt in black color with the words 'I'm an adorable exorcist' sewn on it. On the top of that she seemed so confident for her choice that it was at least laughable.

"So adorable indeed," Allen commented between chuckles.  
"Master Tiedol said that you will love it and sent a matching scarf with your name on it!" she said taking Tiedol's present out of the bag. "Here."

Kanda lost his words for a moment because of his anger but he soon regained his composure and threw the presents back in their bag. There was no way he could accept those presents, let alone wear them. Alex looked at him blinking and in a brief of a moment returned the presents back to his hands, interrupting Kanda's outbreak. Kanda, who wasn't expecting this kind of reaction, looked at her confused for a moment.

"I don't want them!" he scowled, throwing the presents back to their bag yet again.  
"There is no need to be shy," she said smiling and gave him the whole back. "I have to go back to work now."  
"Hold on! I said that-"  
"Enjoy your presents!" she called heading back to the laboratory.  
"I really don't want them!" Kanda yelled and threw the bag on the floor.  
"I think that you should treasure your presents more, Kanda," Lenalee preached him with a pejorative look.  
"Yeah, Kanda. Don't be shy. Treasure your _adorable_ presents more," Allen said with a sly smile.  
"You..." Kanda started grabbing Allen from his shirt.  
"Don't act so childish!"  
"Lenalee is right," Lavi agreed. "Yuu was supposed to tell us-"  
"Don't call me Yuu!" Kanda barked.  
"Ok-ok! Kanda was supposed to tell us the rest of the story. We don't have to quarrel like that. Plus, Lenalee has a point. Even if you don't like it, a present is still a present," he said picking up the back. "One of them is your Master's present as well. You should so more respect."  
"Though he didn't seem to respect my wish to have my peace back," Kanda complained.  
"So, what about telling us the rest of the story now?" Lenalee asked with a smile and Kanda finally let Allen free.  
"Ok," he agreed sitting furiously on a seat nearby.

He wanted to get over with his narration as soon as possible and then get rid of those embarrassing presents. Cursing the moment he had accepted that mission, Kanda continued to relate the events of that time...

…Of course, as they were mentored, they had to take a morning walk together after their breakfast. If he should describe their walk in on word he wouldn't be able to pick one. Embarrassing, catastrophic, awkward maybe? They went shopping, then sightseeing. Kanda had protested strongly against that one to his Master. He was on a mission, sightseeing should be out of question, but Tiedol rejected his protest saying that he should also enjoy things when he had the chance. That didn't make Kanda happy to the least, naturally. After all, he wasn't able to understand even to that day why they had to go through such a plan.

But, even though he was able to tolerate the rest of the walk, he finally snapped when Alex told him that they had to take a photo together. A honorable exorcist of the Dark Order had to take a photo pretending to be a happy civilian who was enjoying his honey moon. They were no way he would do that.

"But Sir Tiedol said..."  
"I don't care!" he barked, drawing the attention of those around him. "I don't car,"e he repeated in a lower tone. "No way. I'm not taking a photo."  
"Why not? You will definitely look good," she protested.  
"That's not the point. I'm not taking this photo, full stop," he stubbornly said folding his arms.  
"Ok."  
"Euh? You are ok with that?" he asked arching an eyebrow.  
"Of course," she said with a smile. "It's ok to feel embarrassed."  
"I'm-! You really don't get it..." he said placing his hands on his knees while taking a big breath.  
"Can I take on alone then?" she asked.  
"Euh? Su-sure... go ahead," he said.

Kanda massaged his temple. He had stay calm no matter the situation, especially when they were going back to the motel. He had to find more clues soon and end they whole story. This kind of thoughts were passing through his mind while he was watching Alex having her photo taken; he had to act as a body guard as well. It was when he felt that someone was watching them. He had that feeling a couple of times since they arrived at that motel.

'Don't tell me... Could it be... That annoying guy..." Kanda's eyes rolled; it was a possibility after all.

"I'm back!"  
"Oh..."  
"I'll come back tomorrow to take her," she said smiling.  
"Why are you so happy for this?"  
"It's my first time taking a picture alone! I usually take one with my Uncle."  
"Hooh, you seem to be close," Kanda commented, not really paying attention though.  
"Very close. I love him," she said smiling even more.  
"I see. How nice... Yes, I believe so too," Kanda said checking the area.

The one who was watching them before should be around there. Naturally, his answers didn't make sense, since he was preoccupied by other thoughts, but he was still answering. Fulfilling his role as a young husband was also part of the mission and in his head, he was doing just fine. Maybe he should ask around for more info, there should be something.

"Come and see this! See this and you will come! Ladies and gentlemen, come and have fun. You take an arch, you take a bow, everyone's mind come and blow. Fine the aim, your price then claim, make all the ladies now to faint,"a man touted.

"What's happening?" Kanda asked.  
"Oh, it's an archery contest. It's a popular event around this areas," Alex informed him. "Men from nearby villages come to join as well."  
"I see. It's strange. I wouldn't hold an event like that if I didn't know who had actually committed the murders," Kanda said pointing at a cafe.  
"That's true, but people tent to forget things like these after a while. Only those who lost they beloved ones find it hard to forget and it's natural."  
"That's true. Look at this newspaper. They were all over the case a couple of days ago and now there is only a small mention in the last pages. I guess they don't find it profitable as a main article anymore," Kanda commented.

They chose a table near the fence of the cafe where almost noone else was sitting. They would be able to talk a bit more freely that way. In the end, they had a lot of time ahead of them before the designated time to return to their motel, so they should spent her in one way of another.

"Do you think that the murderer had come in direct contact with the victims?" Alex asked.  
"Maybe. I don't have enough clues to come in a conclusion though. At this point we can only presumptions."  
"Mr. Kudo..."  
"Euh? What's the matter?" Kanda asked after a small pause since it took him a few moments to realize that she was addressing to him.  
"Do you think that... no, never mind."  
"Finish your question when you start one!" Kanda scowled.  
"I'm sorry."  
"I was thinking... The lady who owns the motel must be really strong. She lost her husband soon after marriage, she has to run her business alone and now he has to deal with her customers' murders... Yet, she-"  
"Don't bother with other people's business. She is not the only person in the world having a hard time. We are here for a reason, focus on that."  
"That's true, but..." she said lowering her head.  
"But why they are all males?" Kanda wondered browsing through the files Tiedol had provided him with, ignoring her.  
"Sir."

Kanda closed his folder quickly. In front of him was standing a man in his early 20s, not very tall, holding a hat. Kanda's eyebrows twitched. That man's plastered smile was annoying the hell out of him, he was the same man who was reciting the horrible poem in order to attract contestants. The man bowed and looked up to him.

"Sir, will you join our contest? You seem to be a fine young man," he complimented.

"I'm not interested in your contest," Kanda said letting his folder on the table.  
"Come on, don't be a chicken!" the man said.  
"Are you from this area?" Kanda asked trying to control his temper.  
"Yes, I'm a native," the man answered.

"Do you want to make some money?"  
"You bet on that!" the young man said surprised.  
"Answer this then... Did any murders take place around the area, before the recent ones?"

The looked surprised and stood up. His plastered smile faded quickly. Strangely, he looked around him before he answers, something which caught Kanda's attention immediately. The man looked hesitant for a moment and then looked Kanda in the eyes, playing nervously with his fingers; you couldn't tell if he was determined or scared.

"No, sir..." he said.  
"Very well," Kanda said after a pause.  
"But... But... Chet was my friend..."  
"Chet?"  
"Yes, he was the owner of the motel, along with Molly. He had so many dreams and... I don't even know what happened. His death was unfair... When Molly returned, she was so different at first... and maybe she still is... Soon after that, those murders started to take place. It's like Chet is haunting the place."  
"I see... so, you don't know anything..."  
"Before those murders... only one murder took place, but it was in our nearby village," the man said. "It's strange, isn't it? Sir, are you a policeman?"  
"Do I look like one?" Kanda asked.  
"No, sir. I guess the recent events caught the interest of the foreigners as well..." he said.  
"Thank you," Kanda said placing some gold coins in the mans hands.  
"Thanks... Thanks for your generosity, sir," the man said using his professional smile once again.

Kanda browsed through the files in his folder again. There was no record for the murder in the nearby village. He double-checked but there was still nothing. Not only the media and the police, but Tiedol and Carrey had overlooked that fact. Maybe there was a connection. But was he really that lucky. That man was the first person he asked for information after all. He noted something on a paper and closed his folder for one more time.

"Let's head back," he said.  
"Ah, shouldn't we stay a bit longer?" Alex asked. "We could go-"  
"We are not here for sightseeing," Kanda interrupted her. "Look, I keep up with my masters whims as much as I can, but I still have work to do. So-" Kanda stopped his own words. "I have to come in contact with my master first. Is there any way?"  
"My uncle buys our everyday bread around this time every morning along with his newspaper. He could pass your message to Master Tiedol."  
"Of course, your uncle..." Kanda hissed. "It was his plan after all..."

Few minutes later Kanda was standing near the local bakery's entrance waiting for Carrey to appear. Someone should search more info about the first murder before the ones which took place there and it was impossible for him to leave the small town. So, his Master or Carrey should be the ones to do the work. Since that plan was their idea, the should follow his orders if they wanted to succeed.

"Oh, what a lovely weather, don't you think?" Carrey greeted tipping his hat. "I hope that a lovely couple like you likes our town."  
"My husband and I are having a great time here, sir. Thank you," Alex said with a smile.  
"Just a question, sir," Kanda said trying to act politely. "Can you tell us how to go, here?" he said pointing at a spot on the paper he was holding.

Carrey remained silent for a moment with a serious expression on his face. Kanda looked around him cautiously, the strange feeling that he was being followed he had was still bothering him. Carrey answered with a smile and gave them some fake instructions, Kanda knew that he had understood what he had to do. After he said goodbye, he proceeded to his usual routine, greeting other people on his way.

"Okay then. I guess we can head back know. Let's leave the rest to your uncle, though I hate to say that."

The rest of the day passed quietly, well the most of the day. A cheesy conversation between the couple next door, their tenacity to spend some time together, the awkward atmosphere when they were alone in the room; Kanda could not stand any of them. When they finally went to bed, he was disappointed once again for the lack of progress that plan had.

"Mrs. Kudo..."  
"What now?"  
"Don't you think that it's very quiet tonight?"  
"What do you mean?"  
"The couple next door."  
'Are you serious? Why do you mention something so unwieldy?' Kanda thought.  
"Ah! It's not like I wanted to hear that," she tried to explain turning around clumsily, standing up slightly, in order to face him. "I just- I just..."  
"You are too close," Kanda mumbled trying to pull back. "Hold-What the hell are you doing?"

He hit the mat hard with her face, loosing her her balance. Kanda sighed deeply and covered his face with his palm. 'Idiot' she would like to say, but he kept quiet instead. It was when he noticed a light coming from the corridor. Kanda raised an eyebrow. That wasn't the first time. He pulled the covers quickly over his head and covered Alex with his body. Seeing her surprised expression, he covered her mouth before she manages to say anything.

"Bear with it for a while," he whispered and she titled her head slightly. "Why the hell are you blushing? That's not what I mean!"

Kanda took a peek towards the door. The light was there indeed and the one who was holding it was standing right in front of their door. It was creepy, in all aspects. He felt Alex fidgeting under him and turned to her annoyed.

"Stay quiet for moment," he said releasing her mouth. "There is someone outside."

However, when he turned around, the light was already gone. Kanda's eyes opened wide and he slipped out of the bed quickly. And surprisingly, whoever that was, he was long gone when Kanda opened the door. That seemed impossible to him though, that person should be very fast. Noting that he should stay in alert next night, he returned to their bed.

"Is everything ok?"  
"Just sleep," Kanda said annoyed.

"O... Okay..."

That night was quiet and Kanda had a nice, long sleep. But it was too quiet considering that the next morning they woke up by the screams of the woman next door...

* * *

**Next Chapter, Kanda saves the day... or not? A moving confession! Let our souls be saved from unwanted misunderstandings!**


End file.
